Humorous Wedding Roast †The Groom’s Odd Behavior this Evening :: Wedding Toasts Roasts Speeches

Humorous Wedding Speech – The Groom’s Odd Behavior this Evening Good afternoon Ladies and Gentlemen - My name is Ron and I am the best man. Now, you may have heard said that being a best man is like being asked to lead the troops into battle - it's a great honour, but nobody really wants to do it. Well, I only agreed on the condition that it wouldn’t interfere too greatly with my own enjoyment of the wedding day, in particular the free food and drink. But as it happens, I’ve not been able to eat a thing all day - I’ve more than made up for it on the drink front though. Apparently, my main duty is to give you all an introduction to the groom. This part of the best man’s speech is usually just an excuse to demolish the groom’s good character. Now I’ve thought about this and don’t see any reason to break with tradition. But it’s actually not that easy because Larry is a nice fellow; he obeys all local ordinances, he pays his taxes and he keeps the city tidy - so there is not much I can embarrass him with. However, he does have a few quirks! And if you know Larry well you will already be familiar with them. But for those of you on Pamela's side who are just getting to know him - be on the look out for the following ‘odd’ behavior this evening: 1. Jumping on people’s feet – of course, Larry calls it dancing and if it is, he’s perfected the non-rhythm method. The head looks one way; the body another and the feet kick out. I can only liken it to a bad version of ‘Riverdance’. 2. Frowning during photographs – although I must admit he did raise a smile when his picture was taken outside the church this morning. Probably because this is the first wedding he’d been to where he could walk out without putting any money on the plate. 3. Sniffing wine - if you are in his company when he starts doing this be prepared for a discussion on the body, roundness, and smoothness of his tipple. When he starts saying things like ‘multi-layered’ finish’ and lingering complexity, it’s time to make your get away. 4. Vanishing into thin air - there could be three reasons for this. He’s snuck off to watch his beloved team’s first home game of the season.